I was falling victim to other people’s bullshit. I found myself getting cranky, anxious, and kind of sad because the people I was interacting with in that moment were all of those things. I had to fight my way out of those feelings and make a conscious effort to put myself in a better place. It is not their fault, and I love to be an ear and help friends get through moments or periods of time like this. I also know that I have my moments, and they will be inevitable.
I started thinking what kind of energy I’m putting out there. What was I conveying on socials? What was I conveying in texts and phone calls? How was I coming off? Not that I’m concerned what people think of me, per se, but I was concerned what I was putting out in the world. Was I being unnecessarily argumentative? Was I being negative for no good reason? Was it more than just complaining or having a moment? The answer was kind of a yes.
I want people to feel good and calm during and after interacting with me. I want to put good energy out there and brighten the days of people around me. I took this moment as a little rest stop in life to check myself. I will always be real, but I want to make sure I’m not just layering my shit on everyone else. It’s about a balance, and I want to be more conscious of that balance.
I hope you have a great week. If you need me, you know where to find me.
In a moment of pure joy, along the Oregon coast in the rain