Get What You Want

Sometimes you just don’t get what you want in life. This is no surprise and certainly something I’m used to happening. We may not get what we want, but it often leads to what we need.

I’ve been struggling with this concept for several years and I think I’m finally gaining some clarity on why as things start to “work out” for me this summer. 2025 really has been my year and I’m truly learning why - the work. Why didn’t the Duluth thing work out before? Why didn’t that relationship go well? Why didn’t that job satisfy my needs? Reframe the questions. Why wasn’t I ready for Duluth? What was my part in that relationship not working out well? What do I need from a career and workplace to feel fulfilled?

The work that I’ve been doing - going to therapy, learning more skills, taking accountability, and figuring out what I really want out of life is starting to show results. I’m surrounded by people who love me genuinely, I have the opportunity of a lifetime for moving and living somewhere I’ve been trying to get to for five years, and I have a new job that shows a lot of promise without a lot of dread.

I used to bitch and moan about life and then not do much to change it. I’m currently bitching and moaning about my body, but I’m slowly working on that yet again - the battle that never ends. Back in the day, I was so unhappy in Texas, but then I started the 52 Hike Challenge and it changed my entire world. I didn’t see it then, but it really was the catalyst of change that propelled me into doing the work necessary. Maybe it was a slow start, and it was well into my 30s, but here I am at 40 pushing forward.

There are plenty of things I want that I can’t have at this very moment. But, in time, maybe some things will fall into place with the work I’m doing today. Some good things just take time, extra work, and hope. I never get bored because boredom feels like stagnation which feels like death to me. There’s always something for me to learn or a new adventure to take, and I’m going to keep learning and doing the work. Thank you to everyone in my life who continues to support and love me unconditionally. I have the best support and I know that’s made a huge difference. I’m always here if any of you need anything. Keep pushing, you’ve got this.